Hallowe'en

Not a great time of the year for Lyme. Well, not that there's a good time for Lyme, but....  Hallowe'en is an excellent reminder because it's really just supposed to be FUN. (This year I was Sleeping Beauty. Probably with less 'beauty' and more 'zombie' - although 16 hours sleep might add some points...)  

Also the no sugar* (healthy fuel, healthy body.... we only had a little left over 😋) and no alcohol (stops medication working), um, and no energy really take the fun out of it.

... Can I just take a moment to point out I've not had a SINGLE cocktail since May? Not ONE drop of alcohol. Psychic mother even cut short my mental arithmetic in a restaurant as I was attempting to calculate the half life of this really really really really tempting cocktail and whether it would be out of my system by the time I infused my next dose of antibiotics. Imagine:

Scene:

'HARVEST'

Local & organic 'farm-to-table restaurant

LONG ANTICIPATED FIRST VISIT 

(Anti-nausea medications perfectly timed -  I was HUNGRY!)

ME: [silently thinking] I could eat almost anything on this menu... so many veggie choices!  Organic cheeses! Wild caught fish!** Grain bowls.... quinoa! Wild rice! This must be how a normal person feels when they could have practically ANYTHING from a menu*...
How do they choose?!

[turns page] 

oohhhhh, those cocktails sound so good.... green tea with cucumber vodka & lime... I wonder how many units of alcohol in a martini glass here? I could have it tall.... I wonder if antioxidants in green tea cancel anything out? I wonder what the half-life of vodka is... [reach for phone, unlock screen...]

PSYCHIC MOTHER: [barely glances up] Don't bother calculating how long it will take to get a cocktail out your system.... you have blood tests in the morning, they'll still show alcohol.

ME: I was just looking.... 
😲

 [thinks] Damn. Blood tests. Forgot about those. But wait..... HOW DID SHE KNOOOOW??!! 

*Limited diet: general super healthy diet supports treatment; some treatment protocols follow specific diets
**Yes, technically I'm 'pescatarian', but I think it sounds a tad pretentious. And super-extra hipster...

Now THAT'S spooky!

PSYCHIC MOTHER
My Dad used to joke to my Mum, "If your mother was a witch...." & trail off
Not sure if he got scared 😉 or realized he was saying it about me too...😜
But this photo is just too good....!!
(Don't have to be psychic to guess she's not going to love it as much as I do.)

Back to today.... there's dressing up in elaborate costumes (yourself, house, child, dog... whatever)/ the excuse to dress up or wear crazy make up if you like doing so, but need the excuse! And the million different Pinterest ideas you just HAVE to try one day (mostly baking - with more sugar). None of those is especially 'Lyme-friendly' (it's that 'I need energy' thing).  I didn't even get pumpkin carving this year... putting a hacksaw & 'the sharpest knife I can find' in either hand didn't seem like the best idea... A little decorating, joint effort:

The American 'Happy Halloween'
does puzzle me...

I did binge watch Stranger Things 2, at the weekend, of course, (it's SO good!) because my weekends are for resting right now: "resting enables healing"- not something I usually embrace, but thank you Netflix!  But (no spoilers) while attempting a couple of 'very simple' Pinterest Halloween projects in the garage; there was scratching in the roof space above my head, and the first image that popped into my head was a demogorgon. I mean, not consciously, a good story just stays with you, right?! 

At least I still have 2 arms ;-)

I have to admit, anything I manage to do successfully with my arm (arms.... PICC line has been a bit uncomfortable too, I've had to be extra careful with it) feels like an accomplishment - even wrapping some toilet roll around a football & a mannequin or sticking some sticks through a flower pot & some bin bags! And some creative results... in the dark!

Quite honestly, these were because I was determined not to fall asleep after physio, as napping
 seems to be messing up my sleep. I thought (hoped!) I'd sleep at a 'normal' time if I made myself
 stay awake - of course,  I never learn... didn't work!

 But my Pinterest 'shadow witches' didn't look too bad! (In the dark.)

On my hunt for Halloween quotes - specifically Shakespeare's witches from Macbeth,  I decided I like this one from Tim Burton instead. It feels like it could have many applications and feels more fitting with my blog. I definitely feel like I dress up some (most?!) days - my true self is still in bed, sleeping. Sometimes, especially this year, it feels like my brain stays with it!

"Every day is Halloween, 

isn't it? For some of us..."

~ Tim Burton ~

It's October!

Really, October! I guess most people are well aware of that fact, since it's a very common and normal thing to know...plus shops are full of Halloween 'decor' and pumpkins, for those of us who do need a reminder since I seem to have 3 day weeks (physical therapy) & 4 days sleeping... or close enough! Time seems to just fly past, in one way. Some days do seem reeeeallly long. So it's probably not necessary to remind anyone else, but... my blog, my title, my reminder.... my exclamation mark! My:  'I can't believe I last posted in AUGUST!'

I really thought I would at least manage a blog post a week... then a month.... then, well I guess I slept a lot! (It's healing!)  I have had various ideas - mainly: I should blog with photos, it's easier. So I do have collections of photos from various things we've tried, along with a few stories and I'm aiming to 'catch up' to the end of October... by the end of October 😀.... mainly by organising and posting the assortment of photographs I've been planning to use.   Hopefully afterwards, I will actually manage to take advantage of my good days and engage a bit more !(Although good days are somewhat fewer right now, but I'm hopeful that means we are getting to the deepest parts of spirochaetal infection and pulverising the little Lyme-hell inducing buggers!). 

So, an overview of the past 3 months...

When I arrived here in May, we began 'deconstructing' my body and its somewhat obstinate, definitely obscure, health issues again. We made a plan (by that I mean I had about a dozen medical appointments) and we moved forward ... then we adapted, made a new plan and pushed on with that.... I blogged a few times about what we were doing and... now it's October!!

We kept going... made a plan, pushed on....then we stepped back, puzzled over some stuff, made a new plan and pushed on with that... then.... we remembered why the word plan has never really been the best word dealing with my body and its rollercoaster recovery. We 'decided' (like it was a choice) to go with my gut - which has been pretty damn good in this whole saga; it's so important to remember to listen to your body and trust your instincts when it's your body that you can feel.... screaming at you!

So right now, and for the past several weeks, physical therapy has been purely working with 'how I feel today'. There is no doubt that the ongoing IV Lyme treatment has systemic effects - it's going directly into my blood to target infection at the deepest possible level, and spirochetes can affect the entire body, especially when left to run (spiral/ drill) riot, unchecked throughout the entire body AGAIN - of course it's affecting everything!  


But my PT can "feel a difference" in all my muscles  (good side included) on weeks that the Lyme treatment affects me more (it goes in cycles). That wasn't really something I had thought about, but it's a HUGE validation of something usually only I can feel - most importantly,  it means it's working (torturously!).

So, I have continued to infuse Lyme medication every day, as part of my protocol (I have oral meds and some herbs & supplements too); I have continued to go to PT three times a week - sometimes I make it into the gym-area, mainly for some lower body strength training; other times I hardly move from the treatment bed while knots and spasms are worked out of my muscles; and dislocated ribs and twisted bones are eased back into place. (Yeah, that's fun.)

And so I continue on this path for now - things are so much better than at the beginning of the year - unbelievably so! - but they still have a long way to go. We have positive and encouraging signs that things are working. And I have complete trust in my 'team' of medical professionals here,  who offer such fantastic support - even after all this time.

The photos are more interesting, I promise. And coming soon....!